Lifestyle Glossary
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The lifestyle is awesome because it is a very welcoming and open place for many different people. Here are some terms you might encounter and their usual definitions. Everyone has different experiences, so some might have slightly different interpretations of terms. You should use this glossary more as a general guideline to give you a better idea of what a term means. When in doubt, ask the person instead of assuming you are using the same definition.
420. Marijuana
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AC/DC. Bisexual man or woman
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Alpha Dominant. A person can be related to a BDSM lifestyle.
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Back Door Action - involving the butt
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Bareback - Sex without condoms
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BBC - Big black cock
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BBW - Big, beautiful women, often very big. A few pounds overweight would be curvy, not BBW.
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BDSM. Bondage, Domination/Discipline, Sadism, Masochism. BDSM fetish tends to be less focused on sex and orgasms and focuses more on control and power.
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Cock Blocking. Doing something that sabotages a man close to having a sexual play. It can be someone accidentally ruining the sexy vibe or a friend who intentionally does something to ruin the man’s chance of sexual fun. Generally, it refers to anyone doing something that sabotages another person’s sexual success.
Compersion. Positive and enjoyable feelings one experiences when their partner enjoys pleasure. The opposite of feeling jealousy.
Consent. A voluntary informed decision that is communicated and can be revoked at any time for any reason. When in doubt, ask and don’t assume.
Cougar. An older, attractive, sexually liberated woman who favors younger men.
CPL. Couples can be married or dating.
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D&D or DDF. Drug & disease free.
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Dom/DommeDom (dominant male) or Domme (dominant female). These are people in the BDSM lifestyle who prefer to have control and power over submissive people, aka subs.
DP. Double penetration can be two things in one hole or two in different holes of a person.
Drama. Refers to any fighting, jealousy, insecurity, or any emotional hassle. Everyone has a certain level of drama because humans are emotional beings, which is okay. It becomes a problem when drama from one relationship isn’t managed and overflows into another.
Exclusive. When people form a closed group that only has sex with people within the closed group. A couple could be exclusive with only themselves, another couple, or multiple people.
Exhibitionist. The person who enjoys performing sexual acts that other people can observe.
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FMF/FFM. A threesome with female, male, and female. The ordering of the letters implies who will play with each other. FMF implies no bisexual female action, with the man in the middle. FFM implies bisexual lady action.
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Gang Bang. A woman having sex with many men who take turns with the woman. Group gangbangs often have about 3 to 6 men for each woman attending.
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Golden Shower. Urinating on someone who sexually enjoys it. Not allowed at Kelly's Dreamland.
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Group Room. Playroom where orgy action is often encouraged. It is very common for multiple people to be engaged in a chain of sexual actions. You should still ask for permission before engaging with someone in a group room.
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IRL. In Real Life
ISO. In Search Of
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Kink. Any sexual fetish. This includes anything like swinging, BDSM, cuckolding, role-playing, etc. We all have different kink preferences and tolerances.
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Kelly's Kinky Connections. Social gathering, similar to a meet & greet. It is usually held publicly to connect with like-minded people and curious newcomers. It is a no-pressure opportunity for communication, and physical activity is usually not allowed on-site.
Lifestyle. A term that means different things to different people. It is more of an umbrella term for different sexual lifestyles and can refer to various areas, including nudism, Swingers, BDSM, and fetish.
LS. It is an abbreviation for lifestyle because it has too many letters for some people to spell.
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Ménage à trois. The fancy French way of saying a threesome is where three people of any combination temporarily join for a sexy playtime.
Moresome. It usually refers to group play/orgy setting.
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Newbies. Any person that is relatively new and not very experienced in the lifestyle. Nothing wrong with being a newbie.
NMK (Not My Kink). We all have different kinks, and not everyone likes the same sexy things or to the same level.
NSA. No Strings Attached. Implies casual sex without any expectation of communication or follow-up afterward.
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Off-Premise. Dreamland events that do not allow physical play at the event. They are social events to find people to bring elsewhere for physical play.
On-Premise. Dreamland events that allow physical play at the event. There are usually designated rooms for sexual interactions.
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Orgy Group Sex Play. Even during orgy play, you still should ask for permission from each person before you play with them. Just because someone is playing with others does not permit you to play with them without asking first.
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Open Play Room. A room that allows sexual activities out in the open. There are no private areas.
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Play. Any level of sexy fun, from kissing to full sex.
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Polyamory. Multiple people in a dedicated relationship. Each person involved in the polyamory relationship is honest and upfront with their partners about being in a relationship with more than one person. It can be a three-person love triangle or a more complex arrangement. These relationships can be open or closed to others, & can be straight, gay, or any combo.
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Prostitution. Money exchanged for sex or sexual activity. This is not allowed at Kelly's Dreamland.
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Rope Play. A bondage fetish involves binding someone using a rope. The rope and its knots can be formed into artistic displays. Rope play does not necessarily lead to actual sex. Some people prefer the act of binding or being bound more than actually having sex.
S & MS. is sadism, also known as pleasure from inflicting pain, and M is masochism, aka pleasure from receiving pain. People in the S&M lifestyle often do not orgasm or have penetrative sex. They often find more pleasure in giving or receiving pain.
Safe Word. A pre-designated word or signal to communicate a person is no longer comfortable and wants to return to a safe place. Saying the safe word is equivalent to revoking consent and pushing an emergency stop button. Common in the BDSM community and will immediately stop all activity.
Same Rooms. Refers to swinging couples that swap partners for sexual play within the same room. Can be one bed or separate beds but everyone remains in the same room.
SBF. Single black female
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SBM. Single black male
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Sex. A wide-ranging term that usually means something different to each person. You can have fun debating with your friends if masturbation, oral play, or sexual touching is or is not sex. As long as it is consensual, relax and enjoy.
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Sex-Positive. The general concept of viewing sex as a natural pleasure in life. It is a non-judgmental approach accepting different approaches to enjoying consensual sex among adults. Sexual interactions are seen in a positive light, and sexual repression is viewed negatively.
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SM. Single man. If it’s S/M that’s referring to BDSM fetish.
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Squirting. Female ejaculation is surprisingly not rare. Leaves a big wet spot and you will probably want to lay down a towel before playing.
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Stag. The male half of an open relationship couple. Focused more on proudly sharing and not being submissive like a cuckold.
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Sub. Submissive person in the BDSM lifestyle. A sub is happier when they are being controlled and directed by a dom or domme.
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Swinger. Anyone who identifies themselves as a swinger. You can decide your own play style and rules. We aren’t going to judge. Life is more fun when we are inclusive and welcoming of others.
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Unicorn. Single females within the lifestyle because they are rare.
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V Safe. Man who had a vasectomy. Some very vocal people about being V-safe use this as code for open-to-bareback sex. Many people are just referring to the extra precaution against pregnancy worries and not implying bareback sex.
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Vanilla. It is not a part of the lifestyle community, normal, conventional, plain.
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Vixen. A female of an open relationship couple who is open to playing by herself or in front of her proud partner.
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YKINMK (Your Kink Is Not My Kink). A good reminder that we all have different kinks and sexual preferences. Life is nicer when we are respectful and non-judgmental towards people who might be different from ourselves.
